1. where do you find a dog with no legs?
– Right where you left it
2. Why was the dog stealing shingles?
– He wanted to become a woofer
3. What do you call a dog with no legs?
– It doesn’t matter, he still won’t come when you call
4. Why do dogs make terrible dance partners?
– They’ve got two left feet!
5. If your dog was barking on the front door and your wife knocking on the back door, who should you let in first?
– The dog, because at least it would shut up once it got in.
6. Two guys come across a dog licking it’s own balls.
– One of them says, “man I wish I could do that.”
– The other one says, “I’d pet him first if I were you”.
7. Our dog suddenly ran to the front door and barked. “Who is that?”, my son asked.
– “It was the dog”, I responded.
8. I was reading a great book about an immortal dog the other day.
– It was impossible to put down.
9. What do you call a deaf dog?
– Anything you like, it can’t hear you.
10. Me: My dog has no nose.
Friend: How does he smell?
Me: Awful.
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